I hope you had a beautiful weekend. The last weekend of July is usually a big one. There’s lots of festivals, happenings, and get-togethers. This past weekend we celebrated my mother-in-law Martha’s life and art with family and friends at the Ruth Wells Center for the Arts, where Martha used to teach and live in its early days!

She was a prolific fiber artist and the show featured her quilts, sweaters, hats, bags, laces, embroidery, and hand spun yarns – among other things. If you’re a knitter, you can actually still purchase her patterns on Ravelry. 

Anyways, at the show, we did a short memorial program for Martha, where my sister-in-law, husband, and cousin shared some of Martha’s writing, thanks, and remembrances. I read a poem that I found online some months ago and thought it was perfect, and shared a few thoughts. 

A few weeks back I wrote about how legacies can be tangible and intangible and I was thinking about that quite a bit when I prepared my remarks. Here’s approximately what I said: 

Today we’re all familiar with the term “influencer.” It generally means someone online who encourages you to buy things. Before social media was a central part of our lives, Martha was one of the original influencers. But there was a big difference – she would influence you not to buy things. And if you still really wanted whatever it was, she’d influence you to make it yourself. 

In the stories I’ve heard from friends, family, and acquaintances over the past few days, I can see that Martha spent her life influencing us all in so many ways. 

As a teacher, she influenced us to try new things so that we could fail with grace, and then succeed beyond what we thought possible. 

She influenced her two children to love deeply, and dream big. 

She influenced her granddaughter to dance and sing, and play outside, to be creative, and be curious about the world around her. 

By example, she influenced us all to persevere, even when it was hard. 

She influenced us to look at those little things that we would normally just pass by without noticing, and to really appreciate them, and find their beauty. 

She influenced us to listen to each other, the way she always listened to us. Just like in my favorite memories of her: sitting on my front steps, drinking our coffee, watching my daughter play in the grass, and taking our small talk and making it big. 

She influenced us to be kind to ourselves and others. Because she knew, and taught us that in the end, that is the most important thing. And in getting to know her in life, and after, she influenced me to understand that the way we treat and love one another really is the meaning of life. 

And while she stitched all of these wonderful pieces that we see displayed here today, some of the most important work she did was sewing the stitches between all of us, bringing us all into her life and family, and helping us to create bonds that will last well into the future. 

And so when I look at these wonderful pieces that she left us, the ones we can see and touch, I will also think about all of the work she did that we can’t see, all of the love and influence she used to knit us together. And I know I will appreciate both for years to come.